What is happiness? This is an old and timeless question, and everyone may have a different answer. However, there are some scientific studies and practices that can help us better understand and improve our happiness. “Harvard Happiness Course” is one such course. It was established by Harvard University psychology professor Tal Ben-Shahar. It has attracted more than 1,400 students to take it and has become the most popular course in Harvard history. One of the courses. “The Harvard Happiness Course” covers many topics about happiness, such as positive psychology, self-acceptance, goal setting, relationships, sense of meaning, and more. In this article, I would like to share 10 of these useful ideas with you, hoping to bring you some inspiration and help. **1. Allow yourself to have shortcomings, make mistakes, and be a human being instead of a god. Be tolerant of yourself within reasonable and legal limits. ** Many people have excessive expectations and requirements for themselves and always want to be perfect, but this often leads to stress, anxiety and dissatisfaction. The truth is, no one is perfect, everyone has their own strengths and weaknesses, and makes mistakes and failures. We should accept our imperfections rather than deny or suppress them. When we are more forgiving to ourselves, we can forgive ourselves and others more easily, and enjoy the good things in life more easily. **2. Too much of a good thing is not a good thing. Playing two good songs at the same time is just noise. ** So, keep what you really want and throw away what you don’t really want, even if it is precious. What brings happiness more than material abundance is time abundance. In today’s society, we are faced with countless choices and opportunities, but this does not necessarily mean more happiness. On the contrary, too many choices can leave us confused, hesitant, and regretful. We may accumulate a lot of things that are unnecessary or inappropriate for us out of greed or fear, while neglecting what we really want and need. We should learn to let go of things that have no value or meaning to us, no matter how tempting or precious they may seem. In this way, we can free up more time and space to do the things that make us happy and satisfied. **3. Don’t give up trying what you really want to do because of fear of failure. Courage is not the absence of fear, but persistence in moving forward despite fear. ** Failure is an inevitable part of life, but many people view it as a shame or threat and avoid doing things that are risky or challenging. However, this approach will only cause us to miss many opportunities for growth and progress, and it will also cause us to lose a lot of fun and excitement. We should change the way we think about failure and see it as an opportunity for learning and feedback rather than an endpoint or sentence. We should be brave enough to pursue our dreams and goals, and never give up even if we may fail. Courage is not the absence of fear, but persistence in moving forward despite fear. **4. Research shows that failure is really the mother of success. The most successful people are often the ones who fail the most. Learn to face your own failures and learn from your failures. This is the only way to learn. ** Many successful people have a common characteristic, that is, they have experienced many failures, but they did not get discouraged or give up. Instead, they learned lessons and experiences from failures and constantly improved and improved themselves. For example, before Thomas Edison invented the light bulb, he tried thousands of materials without success. But he did not think of himself as a loser, but said: “I did not fail, I just discovered a thousand ways that didn’t work.” Like Edison, we should regard failure as the only way to success. Rather than a dead end. We should learn to face our own failures and learn from our failures. This is the only way to learn. **5. The thing that can give people the most happiness is good interpersonal relationships. Intimacy is more important than many things. It brings healing love and warmth. ** Humans are social animals, and we all need to get along and communicate with others to satisfy our needs for belonging and love. Research shows that good relationships are one of the most important determinants of happiness. Having a close and supportive partner, family, friends, etc., can make us feel safe, confident, happy, and can help us cope with stress and difficulties. We should cherish and maintain our interpersonal relationships, give care, respect, trust and understanding to others, and also accept the love and help from others. **6. Change from wanting to be recognized to wanting to be understood. Many times a person is not liked because he is perfect, but because he is real. Being liked because of authenticity is lasting, easy and sustainable. ** Many people have a desire to be recognized and praised. This is not wrong in itself, but if you pursue external evaluation and affirmation excessively, you will lose yourself. We may sacrifice our thoughts and feelings to please others, or act contrary to our own in order to conform to other people’s expectations. Although doing so may temporarily gain the favor or admiration of others, it will not lead to true happiness and satisfaction. We should change from wanting to be recognized to wanting to be understood. Many times a person is not liked because of perfection, but because of authenticity. Being liked because of authenticity is lasting, easy and sustainable. **7. Ask more positive questions. Positive questions will guide people to think positively. ** Our questions often determine our answers, and our answers influence our emotions and behaviors. If we always ask negative questions, such as “Why am I so unlucky?” “Why can’t I do it?” “Why doesn’t anyone like me?” etc., we will fall into a state of self-pity and powerlessness, and thus Leading to more misfortune and failure. Instead, if we ask positive questions, such as “What am I grateful for?” “What can I do to improve my situation?” “What strengths and resources do I have available to me?” etc., we will be motivated. own positivity and creativity, thereby bringing more happiness and success. We should ask more positive questions. Positive questions will guide people to think positively. **8. When encountering painful things, do not chew your pain over and over again, because the more you chew, the more painful it will be. ** Pain is an inevitable part of life, but how we deal with it can determine our happiness. After some people encounter painful things, they will constantly think back and analyze their unfortunate experiences, trying to find out the reasons and responsibilities, or imagine what would have happened if they had done things differently. This behavior is called “rumination” and it doesn’t help us solve problems or relieve pain. Instead, it can plunge us deeper into negative emotions and self-doubt. We should avoid rumination and instead adopt some active coping strategies, such as seeking support from others, diverting attention, developing action plans, etc. **9. Understand what kind of person you are and choose a recovery and relaxation method that suits you. ** In our busy and stressful lives, we all need some recovery and relaxation time to relieve stress and recharge. However, not all recovery and relaxation methods are suitable for everyone. Some people are extroverts, who like to communicate and interact with others, which makes them feel excited and satisfied. Some people are introverts who like to be alone and meditative, which can make them feel calm and secure. We should understand what type of person we are and choose a recovery and relaxation method that suits us based on our personality characteristics. For example, extroverts can choose to participate in activities such as parties, sports, and travel; introverts can choose activities such as reading, writing, and meditation. **10. Exercise is a necessity, and exercise is an investment in the present and future. ** Exercise has many benefits for both physical and mental health, which have been proven by countless scientific evidence. Exercise can strengthen our immune system, cardiovascular system, skeletal system, etc., and prevent various diseases and aging. Exercise can also promote our brain function, emotional regulation, memory, etc., and improve our learning and work efficiency. Exercise can also make us stronger, more confident, and have a better quality of life. Exercise is an investment in your present and future, and we should treat it as a lifestyle habit, not a burden or luxury. We should choose appropriate exercise methods based on our interests and abilities, such as running, swimming, yoga, dancing, etc., and maintain at least 30 minutes of moderate-intensity exercise every day.
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